Question:
A vendor friend of mine is in a really bad situation. His dad had severalstrokes about 7 years ago,so he moved his dad and mom in with him,his wife anddaughter. Well,Dad's condition,due to Parkinson's or whatever,has deterioratedhorribly. Dad wakes up about every hour and a half all night long,and he wakesthe whole family. He wears Depends or some such,but he takes them off and peesin the bed or wherever. No one gets a good night's sleep. Vendor's wife phonedhim on his cell phone while he was at the market yesterday,saying he's evenworse now. He is very confused,doesn't know where he is..etc. The family can'tafford an adult home,live-in nurse,or whatever. Vendor has Wermer's disease sois trying to help by making soap and (trying to) sell it. His wife is a nurse.Ithink maybe vendor get disability from when he,too,was a nurse. Poor vendor isat his wit's end,and he's such a very nice person I feel so bad for him.

Any thoughts about alternatives?

Answer: Does your friend have internet access? The are some very good groups onParkinson's that would probably be able to help since they've been there.Meanwhile there are outfits made specifically for people who disrobeinappropriately, they zipper in the back or have shirt and pants sewn together.I've heard Silverts is very good.http://www.muggsmulcher.com/kstuff/a.s.a/links.htm#careaides

For the sleeping they might want to try melatonin. Not the full 3mg pill tho.There is a clinical trial going on that recommends 1/4 to 1/2 a pill. I startedmy Mom on 1/4 and ended up with 1/2 since that seemed to work best. TMMV. Italso didn't make her "drugged out" the next day like some other meds might. Makesure they check with the Dr first since many dementia's look similar but somemeds are really bad for certain dementia's. Hard to know what really going onwith so little info.Melatonin is at the bottom of the pagehttp://www.alzforum.org/dis/tre/drc/default.asp

A link that might be very helpful for finding benefits in their area. Lots ofpeople have used it and not received spam from entering the info.http://www.benefitscheckup.org/

Trying to get him into a NH might be the best scenario but I'd recommend theysee an elder care attorney. Medicaid rules vary significantly by state sincethey are state run programs with some federal funding. Spouses do get to keep acertain amount and Medicaid does look back 3-5 years for any transfers ofassets. It's very complicated and worth an attorney IMHO. There might befree/discounted ones that would help. He should call his local Dept of Elderlyaffairs to see what the scoop is. They should also start looking at local NH'ssince there is usually a 1 year wait for those places you would actually wantyour LO to be in. Private pay at first does seem to help placement faster. It's*very* hard to transfer someone already in a NH and onMedicaid. If he does have internet access there is a Medicare compare site tostart looking and see what the latest inspectors found and if they take Medicaidand have a locked dementia unit. Links for both thecompare site and Medicaid help are on the AD FAQ page.