Question:
My Grandmother hasrecently been diagnosed with Alzheimers. She lives 3000 miles awayfrom me (she's in Maine, I'm in Arizona). Her son, my Uncle, justmoved her into a nursing home. As far as I can understand, herdifficulties lie in cooking for herself and making decisions (she had astroke in January which is also contributing to this). She can't talkvery well, either. But she still recognizes everyone, though it's hardfor her to communicate.

I want to be able to support her and comfort her, but I'm so far away Idon't know how. I haven't had much exposure to Alzheimers, so I don'tknow what would upset her or what she would understand. I send herletters which she can't answer, though my Uncle says she enjoys them.And I plan on sending her a package with things from my state - apicture book, jams & jellies, things like that.

Is anyone else in a similar situation, or can anyone offer suggestionson how I can communicate how much I care for my Grandmother, to her ina way she can understand?

Answer: First, let me commend you on being a caring grandson. So manyfamily members disappear when they hear about a LO with adisease that is beyond their comprehension.As to what you can do to offer your support, why not take a cluefrom your uncle who says that Grandma enjoys your letters. Keepthose letters coming! I would also suggest that you send her apicture of yourself in an inexpensive plastic frame, so she canhold it and look at it, and know who the letters are comingfrom.I have learned, thru my experiences with my AD husband, that oneof the strongest means of communicating, long after words havelost their meaning, is LOVE

Keep doing what you're doing. The other thing my mom always likes ispictures, even if she doesn't always know who they are. Sometimes whenwe look at them and talk about who they are, she remembers. And theydon't need to be new pictures. Older pictures can bring back memories.